The ficade of the american dream; secureity and a prosperious future captivate me no longer. Looking back upon a history of champions of humanity and progress and to know and accept the state of today and the prospects for tomorrow serves to douse the illusion change will come from with in this corrupt system. A fool, or a crazy person rather, engauges in the same process and expects different results.

I am also aware that to run is just as impossible, but between the two, more fullfilling and closer to the reason we claim to murder children and their families: Freedom. I will persue it by being modest and of little burden to life as a whole. I will kidd myself that I can sail away, or live in the mountains and notbe subject to the catastrophy that is the water, air and lack of conscience and awarness of people. This seems more inspiring than to trust yet another politition because he's black and a gifted speaker.

Today the head lines read of more war. I cannot believe that this afternoon, the streets are plesant, resturants are full and people are getting drunk and throwing away some much garbage.

I hold no ill wishes for this system or the perpatrators, or the supporters. I simply wish for clean air and water so I will conduct my life as if I was the only one responsonsible for maintaining the health of our life-support systems, or, the only one who could poison them.

My boat is scantly outfitted for a voyage, and I intend on pushing my limits until they break. It is healthy and promotes growth of charecter and I would rather lie at the bottom of the bay and feed the crabs than be just like all these people who don't care about what it takes to maintain this excess. I can not change them and they don't want to change. War is ignored and resturants are open.

OF love, I am taking what I need and I admit I need more than most. I am weak these days. I have gained though, my recent trip to the west has got me on the rebound. I owe much gratitude to the man, who on many occasions has been accused of being my brother, for his strenght and example he sets with is words and actions. None of us are perfect, but of all I know, he is one of the realest people there ever was. His family, not suprisingly is a true inspriation as well. To know this man, and then his father is to see the sun in everything. I express love rather crudely these days, but to them, I can only feel it and hope it makes the world a better place some how.

My immedate family has trusted me enough to put there life in my hands as we went for a sail in my boat the other day, minus my father. My mother enjoyed the peacefulness of sailing on a gental day; lying in the birth down below, rocked to sleep by the smooth motion of water and wind. My brother at the helm was where he should be; a captain. Strong willed and entirely capable, his actions upon his first sail were enough to allow me to look only at my task. I hope to spend some time with the two of us, the oldest of friends and two from eternity I would enjoy all the ups and downs of a trip intot he unknow with my brother.

And so the bottom line: Love. Give it when you can and when you can't swallow your pride and ask for it for it from everyone you meet. There is enough to go around.